It was about 10:30pm a few nights ago and I was feeling tired and grumpy. For some reason I decided that buying something on the internet would make me feel happier, and was better for me than eating half a tub of ice cream. I am pretty embarrassed to admit it but the item I bought was a cheese making kit. I justified it by saying that it would save us money in the long term but the reality was I just wanted to have it.
I really wish it wasn’t true but I frequently struggle with materialism. It is far too frequent that I see something that I want and I keep thinking about it until I get it. Even the silly cheesemaking kit has been on my to-buy list since about February. I congratulate myself on waiting so long to buy it but the reality was I have been keeping it in the back of my mind to buy it as soon as there weren’t other things I wanted to buy more. There just always seems to be something I think I need whether it be new clothes, a new cookbook, fancy storage boxes or something else I feel I cannot live without.
Don’t get me wrong, it is not the buying things that concerns me as on the whole I am pretty good with money. It is what lies underneath, my motivation for thinking I need things to make me happier and thinking that life will be easier or better organised if I just have this one thing. It is also the sometimes consuming thoughts and daydreams about what I want to buy, combined with the frustration with the kids when they make it hard to get to the shops to buy the things I think I need.
If you have ever read the Bible you might know the section that says don’t store up your treasures on earth where moths and rust destroy. I really see the reality of this, as when I look back on the things I really wanted to buy and see the clothes I wore a few times and decided I didn’t like, or the appliance which doesn’t work as well as I had hoped and I realise that while these things are not bad in themselves they are not able to satisfy us.
Just because I am a Christian does not mean I can’t shop or have nice things but if I think that these things will make life better (which I often do) then I am deceiving myself. The things that matter and make life better are the lasting things, my relationship with God, relationships with family and friends and even caring for people I don’t even know.
I still don’t have the solution to stopping the desire for worthless material things consuming my thoughts. We try to be generous in giving towards our church, missionaries and our compassion sponsor child which at least means our money is committed to these things each week/month but I do wonder how much more generous I could be if I didn’t desire so many unnecessary things.
I am truly thankful that I have a loving and patient God who knows how much I mess up in so many areas but has still chosen to forgive me and is changing me (despite my resistance) to be less selfish and more generous.
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| Is she starting early? I hope not! |
Definitely food for thought. Bookmarking this one to my iPhone for when I am out shopping. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteOhhh... now I want a cheesemaking kit.
ReplyDeleteI am oh so frugal most of the time, but I have appliances in by kitchen which have never seen the light of day, I feel guilty when I impulse buy. My hubby is so very supportive and will often slip money into my wallet (even when I am working) with a note to buy myself something pretty... but often I buy what the kids need rather than something I want, then I feel guilty for not treating myself. You aren't alone in your struggle. Last weekend I even made a point to look in the OxFam shop to see if I couldn't buy a gift I needed to buy in there, I'm sure they have guilt free goods in there!!
I totally understand. What is it that tricks us into thinking we need this or that. I can justify anything it's sad! We are now struggling with a debt because we wanted what we should not have. Gotten. And yet we, I continue to spend money on things we "need"! When will I learn! I am so thankful for your honesty!
ReplyDeleteKaz - Hope it helps when you are shopping.
ReplyDeleteJulie - Hope I have not tempted you into buying the kit (especially with the most recent post). Thanks for showing me I am not alone. I guess it is a life long journey...hopefully I will get better at resisting soon.
Fi - This world is just so tempting..buy this, buy that. Then we also have the take it now for free...and pay later. It is such a struggle. Thanks for sharing your struggles. It is good to know we are not alone
Hey Lisa - isn't it easy to get sucked in to thinking things will satisfy when they just will not. It often happens to me that I look forward to getting something and within hours of getting it it breaks or get a mark on it and these things while a bummer are also a blessing because it reminds me not to put my hope in these so temporal things but in the things that last - we have a saying in our house when something breaks - "Only the things of the Lord last!" and I love that the kids say this too, especially at times when things they love eg, a baloon bursts! (wordt ever!) but we say only the things of the Lord last and it helps us try and store up those far more precious things in heaven =)
ReplyDeleteMuch love and blessings be upon you as you and I both, seek to honour our Father with our great riches =)