This decision needs a little bit of background. It all started because of a digital photo frame. This frame (pictured below) sits beside our T.V. and is mostly turned off. However in recent weeks my children have become fascinated with it. They love watching pictures of themselves as babies and love trying to guess which baby is in the picture.
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| The digital frame that sends subliminal messages |
Since it has been switched on, it has been rolling through the photos while I sit and watch T.V. Little by little, this device is sending me messages. With each picture, the frame says "Too quick, they are growing up too quick".
Every parent can relate to this. Our kids seem to be babies one minute, then toddlers the next (I'm sure it is worse for parents of teenagers). This thought isn't anything new, but there was something else that this thought stirred in me and it has to do with childcare.
My two eldest girls have been in childcare since the beginning of last year and it is wonderful. The centre we have chosen is lovely and the carers are wonderful. I only have good things to say about the centre. Currently only one of my children attends the centre. My eldest is at preschool and the baby is home with me. My middle girl, Claire attends two days a week.
As the photos rolled through, my heart said. "Why is Claire in childcare when you are at home?", "She is growing up so quick and you could be spending that time with her".
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| Growing up too quick |
So here is my dilemma. Should I take Claire back to only one day a week?
My heart says "Yes!" spend as much time as possible with her. She is only this little for such a short time and I wonder if I will regret not taking the opportunity to have time with her. Although she seems to love childcare when she is there, she often says doesn't want to go. Her days are much longer than the preschool days, so when I do pick up/drop off I really feel someone is missing. I chose to have her in two days because of my study/this blog but now that baby is awake more I am often not using the days for these things. I also think it would be nice for her to have one on one with time with her younger sister.
On the other hand, I worry that taking her back to one day will mean she misses out on the social skills and stimulation that childcare provides. I feel sad that she won't see her teachers as much. I worry that I am doing it for me, because I want to be with her more, rather than because it is good for her.
If I was working, it would be simple and I would not be concerned about her being in childcare. Since I am at home and can look after her myself, I wonder if I should. Is it selfish of me to take up a place in childcare when another family could use it?
Oh! it is all so hard.
Any wise words, advice or your own experience is much appreciated.
What should I do????
Linking up with the lovely Jess from Essentially Jess for:
